deusabinitio:

charlesoberonn:

At my funeral, I’m gonna hire somebody with a scar to look over my body and audibly whisper “I should’ve been the one to finally take you out.”

Alternatively, they could also whisper “They won’t get away with this. I’m gonna finish what you started, old friend.”

They’ll have instructions to read the room and choose which they deem best fit

jumpingjacktrash:

tyzias-irl:

Terezi who’s well aware that she stopped growing at six sweeps and is 4’11 (150cm), but isn’t going to bring up her height if nobody else is: “Shortest person has to vacuum the meteor! That’s you Karkat!”

Karkat who accepted that he would always be the shortest when he was six sweeps old and doesn’t realize he’s 6’10 (208cm) and still growing: THATS NOT FAIR. YOU GUYS CANT SAY THAT EVERYTIME WE NEED TO GET SOMETHING DONE!

headcanon accepted

phantomrose96:

phantomrose96:

When pet owners talk about their pets it’s guaranteed to fall under one of two categories:

  • Rover is the sweetest kindest force in my life, my closest ally, my best friend, the family member who molded me as a person who I would absolutely lay down my life for. Please let me show you photos of this perfection incarnate.
  • Socks is on double secret baby probation now and she’s gated in the living room because she wont stop sneaking out and trying to eat all the towels in the house, like the bastard idiot child she is.

I would like to clarify this is not a “which type of pet owner are you” post. There is no choosing. Pet owners are both of these, all the time, forever. It’s a matter of which one is the conversation topic of the day, and the outcome depends entirely upon how recently their pet tried to eat plastic